Public Service Announcement to all potential patients

Here is my own PSA to anyone who stays in a hospital:
1) When your nurse walks into the room, don't comment on how lucky you are to have a hot nurse. That fantasy will never happen, and you are gross. So is your grandpa who asks what he can do to become your patient.
2) If you brought your camera to a hospital when you are not having a baby, you are weird. You are especially weird if you try and take pictures of your CNA. You are even weirder if you explain that the reason you want to take a picture is to show your wife how pretty your CNA was. WHAT THE HECK? (this has happened a couple times now)
3) When a nurse asks you if they can take your vitals or if they can ______ (fill in the blank), it's never kosher to respond "You can do whatever you'd like to me all day." You are sick, can I switch patients??
4) Don't touch your nurse, anywhere, ever. Even if you think it is friendly. Just don't. We think you have germs, and wherever you touch, I am going to have to leave the room and sanitize the crap out of it.
5) Do not let your toddler crawl on the floor of a patients room. I don't care if you think your family member hasn't soiled the room. Most likely, they have already peed their bed, bled from somewhere, or some skin has fallen off from them. Currently, I am speaking of the patient who has dermatitis (skins literally falls of this person) and a history of herpes and his niece is crawling all over the room. Sick. We eventually stopped this, don't worry.

I did get my hair done on Thursday, so I do look pretty bangin', but I am in baggy scrubs and little makeup. I have a lot more PSA's to post, but these are my current ones of the week.